Buying furniture and stuffz

Buying furniture is not always an easy task. Especially when two indecisive guys with no idea how to make stuff match are in charged of doing the shopping.

Part 1. The Buying phase
So we took the metro to the great big Swedish embassy on Zlicin (also referred to as IKEA by some people) to buy cheap furniture and eat kjöttbullar. Of course no one speaks english at IKEA (we didnt expect anyone to know english, i mean come on it is Czech Republic) but we got extremely disappointed when no one spoke Swedish. Swedish course should be mandatory for future wannabe IKEA employees.

So after walking countless of kms inside of IKEA, arguing, reading loud from swedish books in front of a small czech audience we finally found some furniture. We bought a table, 4 chairs, couch, shelves, tv table, and a coffee table and paid for it to be transported back home to our apartment.

Part 2: The delivery
Now all we had to do was to wait for the furniture the following day, which of course was 2 hours late. We called IKEA on several occasions to enquire about the missing furniture. But it doesnt seem like they like english there. They just hang up on us when they realized we didnt speak czech. So after 6 tries we finally found a guy who spoke english. Didnt do much good though, since the furniture arrived that very second.

Part 3: Assembly (aka. Putting shit together)
Well the upside about IKEA is that its relatively cheap. The downside is of course that swedish people are lazy. So lazy that they dont even bother to put the merchandise they sell you together. No they leave all that fun to you. But as the experienced LEGO and Kinderegg builders we are this was no match. (a IKEA package is basically a huge Kinderegg without the chocolate). Morten jumped on the coffee table at once, knowing that this would be a challenge worthy of his skills. And he did not become disappointed. (it took almost 2 hours). Umit started on the smaller stuff like tv table and chairs. After finishing 4 pieces of furniture he started ranting something about being able to finish 4 pieces in the time Morten used on 1. Morten replied: It takes less time knocking out five 6 year old boys than it takes to knock out one Arnold Schwarzenegger.

So finally, all the furniture are up now, we are still missing some stuff, and we have to buy stuff for our bedrooms, but things are finally starting to come together

The next day Rick and Henrik stopped by and we drank beer and watched Titus. Now THATS a good party. Here are various pictures:

Morten working on the coffee table from hell

Umit used to work as a male model for Calvin Klein before he started
to work at an electronic store. Look at the pose, you cant teach that

Taking a time-out, going to my "inner happy place", hiding from the world

A homage to the tower of Babel.

Our DVD shelf

Rick, Henrik and Morten

Thats how we party!

Stay with me! If you find yourself alone, riding in the green fields with the sun on your face,
do not be troubled. For you are in Elysium, and you're already dead!
Brothers, what we do in life... echoes in eternity.
ROMA VICTOR!!!!!!

Umit's Ride from Bergen 2 Prague

Yes people, that's right. I, Umit Caliskaner, drove from Bergen and all the way too prague in a corolla from 1994! without any problems! well, almost...




I had carefully had planned my trip(yeah right),but as always, nothing goes the way things are planned. I was suppose 2 sleep for a few hours before my jouney, but i found out, what i had left for packing, was much more then i thought. so, instead of sleep, i had to pack ( pakkis ). When i was finally done, i found out i had lost my car keys, and i had too look for them. After 30 min of searching, i grabbed my spare keys and set out for a 26 hour journey.

Bergen - Larvik
I started in Bergen and was driving to Larvik to take the Denmarkboat. I was very tired when i started driving. It was a good combination of Partying saturday night, not a lot sleep and a football match early sunday was the reason for me tiredness. But, i took it as a man and started driving. First thing was checking the car. Oil,water,brakefluid.,lights. The left mainlamp was dead, so i had 2 change it. It wasnt as easy as it sounds. To remove the lamp, i had 2 remove the battery first, which was very hard becouse no one had the right tool for removel. I said F*** IT very loud and drove of for the next station.
I planned to start at 23.00, but since the packing and the loss of key, i had 2 start 1 hour later. which i thought shouldnt be a problem becouse...well i'm turkish and i drive like one. But a fully loaded corolla with a 85kg turk( all muscles thank you very much) and 80 horsepower. It's just pure physics. It was a very boring trip. It was dark, no cars on the road and no one to keep me company. The only way for me 2 stay awake was to sing. Aloud.VERY loud. with the windows down and everything. I drove for 7 and a half hour with only ten minutes of resting in a god forgotten place between Nore and Rollag. That ten minutes was not enough for me. But i couldnt stop for rest either. what if i miss the boat? so i had to keep on drivin'. The last 30 minutes was the worse. i was so tired i couldnt see straight. When i saw a sign for bumpy roads, i was thinking about boobs. But a few slaps on the face and some dangerous and daring passing of other cars, i finally made it to larvik 20 min before the boat was taking of.

The Boat.
Not much 2 say here. I slept for 2 and a half hours and then shoppet a little bit and ate some food.

Food

Fancy toilett!

With a view!



Denmark - Prague.

12.00. The boat docked in Hirtshals Denmark. From here on was only autobahn all the way. yeah baby! This is going to be fun. and it was. a little fun. My Nea ( name of my car, it's a she ) was screaming so much. Poor thing. 140 was all that she could do. We did pushed her up to 160, but that was under the right circumstance. which ment no wind. Nea isnt the most aerodynamic car that has been built. But we managed. Drove thru denmark in 3 and a half hours. and then it was deutchland deutchland über alles! There is something about zie germans. When the speedlimit is 120 and it goes down to 100. Everybody brakes so suddenly, but if the speedlimit is 130 and it goes down to 120 or 100, nobody gives a crap. What's the deal with that? We demend a answer germans!! Anywhooo, germany was fun. Until i was close to berlin. That's when thing got a bit confusing. You see, i had no GPS or map. All i had was driving directions from internett. Take of at that exit and so on. What my directions said did not match with the signs in Berlin. So i was lost for 50 minutes in berlin area, but i found zie road jah!at last! Rest of that tour was pretty boring. I came 2 prague around 2 and me and morten started unloading my car that late. hope we didnt wake anyone.

Gas station in Denmark

A WV BeachBuggy on the Autobahn
140km\h!!

Arrival of the Tøs

The Tøs from a nice angle (Umit sneaking his phone into the dressing room at the store. Turkish style)

We are truly fortunate. Our very own favourite Slut Gunnbjørg decided to jump on a train from Austria and pay us a visit. However this created a small mathematical problem. 3 people, 2 beds. What to do, what to do? Well obviously two people had to sleep in the same bed. Morten refused to bunk up with Umit, as he delicately put it: "Umit gets grabby in his sleep, especially when under the influence of alcohol" (and lets face it, there was going to be beer). So who was Gunbjørg going to bunk up with? Well of course this started another one of Umit and Morten's long and stubborn arguments. However Gunnbjørg started to negotiate and finally an agreement was reached. Shared custody!

For once Morten was quite happy being sick, it gave him an excuse to stay home and chill when the two girls wanted to go on a shopping spree (the longest one lasting for 7! hours).

Not much more to say really, we mostly spent our days drinking beer, shopping (well some of us) and listening to Gunnbjørg complaining about eastern european walking culture (apparently they have none). I think we can say that we miss our Tøs, and she is more than welcome back to Prague (preferably with her hot austrian friends)

P.S Gunnbjørg, eg glemte å poste tax free tingen din. Ikkje skyt meg :o)